392,303 notes

internetmessiah:

I’ve decided I want to be cremated. Not when I die, just whenever. Surprise me.

618,948 notes

zagreus-taking-time-apart:

steampoweredsass:

zagreus-taking-time-apart:

We teach kids to fear animals like rats, snakes, spiders, etc. that are harmless 99% of the time but do we ever warn them about the real danger

image

WHY DOES IT HAVE TEETH ON ITS TONGUE

I am a gooseologist and I can tell you that geese live on a healthy diet of children’s souls which can only be properly chewed with unholy tongue teeth

268,381 notes

jadathan:

ah yes, Labor Day. the day all babies are born. all women give birth on that day. Labor Day.

8 notes

chidoree:

if you threw a pad or tampon into a crowd of boys they would probably all scream and it would be like that scene from monsters inc where george gets contaminated by a sock

287,216 notes